Rare restful evening ... ...

September has really challenging, especially since MY ONE left. Tonight is one of the rare evenings that I get to take a breather, thanks to Claire who has taken over some of the homework checking for her siblings as she has just completed her examinations today. I could even steal a walk downstairs with Noah without a care in the world! Lucky me!

To be honest, I miss MY ONE very much. The lethal combination of loneliness yet stress with the daily juggling of work and family wears me out. There were nights when I fell asleep even before I hit the bed, not to mention the mornings that I woke up only to realise I was in the act of driving the kids to school.

Before this post spirals downwards to all the downsides, let me be reminded that there were the upsides too. 

Firstly, there was the A&E episode at KK when Nigel was rushed in an ambulance as a result of a fractured collar bone suffered during a badminton competition. So where's the up right? I had to steel myself to not show fear in front of him and the medical personnel. But well my emotions got the better of me when his X-ray film showed that alarming gap in his right collar bone and he had to say "I'm so sorry Mummy" at that very moment. My composure gave way... ...it was too much to bear... ...the fear and the pain of watching him suffer but yet feel helpless... ...thankfully he's on the mend currently and irritating the pain out of his siblings. This episode certainly bonded us closer , all the rushing to fetch him from school so that he doesn't have to risk worsening his injury squeezing with the crowd on board a jerky bus. I'm secretly beginning to fall in love with his sense of humour, just like his dad's... ...always thinking so highly of themselves yet seemingly so comically to 3rd parties.

Then there is princess Chloe, she's really picking up in terms of cleanliness and getting more organised. Occasions that I have to chase her for homework are on the decline, just like this evening when I was pleasantly surprised by her, "All done Mummy!", beaming with pride as I stepped home. And for once we are on top of her examinations revision schedule! But of course there were moments when I didn't know to laugh or cry, e.g. putting "sawdust" on fish to keep them fresh was her answer to a science question... ...time to bring her to the wet market more often... ...not forgetting her packing the clown "mask" when it was the N95 "mask" that her teacher was referring to for a class field trip. Thankfully, we checked her bag the night before, else she'd be made a laughing stock!

Then there are the 2 younger rascals. Noah is still pretty stable as he has always been closer to me than Daddy. But it's not so rosy with Nat. He's been acting up rather easily, stickier than usual during the morning childcare goodbye routines, insisting on holding my hand to sleep every night. But I'm relishing the moments being sandwiched in between the 2 boys at night. Before long, they'd rather have their own beds and space.

And of course, my dearest Claire who has grown alot more independent with less angst. Thankful that she's been managing her daily schedules and examinations revision real well, except for a few physics and maths questions that yours truly had a chance to "assist", and chipping in as and when she can, like tonight.

So a note to self: chin up, head high, the kids are looking to their mummy... ...ever more so during Daddy's absence!