I was late, again... ...

I was late for my god-daughter's funeral this afternoon, so reminicent of me being late for my dad's passing away some 10 years back. If only I had brought my mobile along during the visit this morning, I would have been able to see her off... ... just 20 mins was what I would ask of.

Seeing her mummy, my best pal, in the state that she was in, was heart wrenching. She blamed her negative thoughts for causing her baby's death, she wished she could go with her baby to take care of her... ... while I wished I could do more than crying and asking her to stay strong for hubby's sake. Ray was my god-daughter that I never got to meet, she remained in ICU since birth.

That Ray was cremated together with the toys and clothes I bought brought some solace, but the inability to collect her ashes and the resultant throwing of it into the sea did not. The family will continue our prayers for YC, CW & Ray who is now in heaven under God's TLC.

As I cradle Noah sleeping in my left arm right now, motherhood has taken on a new meaning... ...